STONED !!

My mom came up with this the last time I was home. “why don’t u try a stone”, she said, all bubbly and enthusiastic. She had developed a new obsession over the winters. An uncle of hers had suggested we wear stones. Apparently they had worked wonders for his family. According to my name, DOB and stuff, I was supposed to wear a panna or something for good fortune. Good fortune my ass. I gave her this look which when translated to words, would roughly come out to be u have to be kidding me.

 

I hate stones and all such accessories, if I may be permitted to use the word. I’ve seen people with like ten different rings on ten different fingers. And they look gaudy and tasteless. But the fact that they are an eyesore is just the tip of the iceberg. They sort of remind me of tantriks and voodoo magic. Hell, why don’t we just start eating lizard tails and frog tongues and dance around fires. I am a sucker for logic u see. And stones totally fall out of my scheme of things. Its not as if some sort of chemical would diffuse through the skin and bring me great fortune or tone down my anger or resolve my love life ( as if a chemical could exist for the purpose ). Its blind superstition and I refuse to be any part of it. You know what else defies logic. Astrology and Numerology. How in God’s name can the sum of my DOB or the position of stars determine my fate ? The same holds true for this current fad of changing names ( case in point : all the suneils and kareinas of showbiz and the k-soaps on the tube ). Plain insanity I would say. You make something awesome, you would be appreciated, no matter what you are named. Some people might change their names to add that extra zing to it. Of course you can’t do well in movies if u are called gangu ram or champa rani. But I seriously doubt adding an extra e or multiple k’s would make a radical difference.

 

You can see where I am going with all this. I practically hate all forms of divination and other such practices and beliefs. I can come up with ten odd methods off the top of my head. But I suggest u refer to wikipedia for further info, coz thats what I did. And some of them had me laughing my ass off. Take scatomancy for instance : divination based on the examination of animal feces. Yes u heard me….animal poop!! If that isn’t madness, nothing is. Of course if there are religious considerations attached to a particular practice, I have no problems. Though not a huge fan of the concept, I do not question religion, come what may.

 

But enough digression. Coming back to my original dilemma, my mom was persistent. She made the sort of face which when translated to words, would roughly come out to be can’t u do it for me. Moms often do that. I call it emotional blackmail. But i am a hard guy to influence. Pigheaded, some people would say. “No thanks”, I responded. My mom immediately quit the charade. The woman knows me inside out. She knew if pressed any further, I would agree to it and never wear the damn thing again. I know it’s a horrible thing to do. But that’s just the way I am. I avoid conflict at almost all costs, especially with parents.

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One Response to “STONED !!”

  1. Jas Says:

    How abt getting stoned in Hague? .. keede, with ur love life virtually non existant, there would be no harm if you try one.. it can’t get worse than the current plight!!

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